Ți-am scris într-o seară întoarsă pe dos
Acum 2 săptămâni
Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to. ~Bill Vaughn
An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. ~Bill Vaughan
Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man. ~Benjamin Franklin
Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us. ~Hal Borland
New Year's eve is like every other night; there is no pause in the march of the universe, no breathless moment of silence among created things that the passage of another twelve months may be noted; and yet no man has quite the same thoughts this evening that come with the coming of darkness on other nights. ~Hamilton Wright Mabie
We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day. ~Edith Lovejoy Pierce
Of all sound of all bells... most solemn and touching is the peal which rings out the Old Year. ~Charles Lamb
A happy New Year! Grant that I
May bring no tear to any eye
When this New Year in time shall end
Let it be said I've played the friend,
Have lived and loved and labored here,
And made of it a happy year.
~Edgar Guest
An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. ~Bill Vaughan
Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man. ~Benjamin Franklin
Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us. ~Hal Borland
New Year's eve is like every other night; there is no pause in the march of the universe, no breathless moment of silence among created things that the passage of another twelve months may be noted; and yet no man has quite the same thoughts this evening that come with the coming of darkness on other nights. ~Hamilton Wright Mabie
We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day. ~Edith Lovejoy Pierce
Of all sound of all bells... most solemn and touching is the peal which rings out the Old Year. ~Charles Lamb
A happy New Year! Grant that I
May bring no tear to any eye
When this New Year in time shall end
Let it be said I've played the friend,
Have lived and loved and labored here,
And made of it a happy year.
~Edgar Guest
iubesti?? trimite acest mesaj. DAK NU IUBESTI Pastreaza-l si nu vei iubi niciodata,Si in 5 min dragostea ta iti va da buzz sau beep.... :: sorry de mass ptr cey cu DND....si... daca iubesc si il pastrez? =))
si... daca nu vede mesaju si nu imi da bip?
si... nu aveam DND ...nu ma priveste partea cu sorry
la cate dinastea am primit ar trebui sa fiu cea mai nefericita persoana....ca nu am dat mai departe :))
...stai ca acuma ma gandeam sa mai caut prin arhiva ca sigur mai am :))
Trimite si tu la tine in lista ji vei vedea cn te ubeste 0% - pt mn nici nu existi 20% - te mai si salut 40% - iti vorbesc 50% - prieteni 60% - mai mult decat prieteni 70% - cred ca te iubesc 80% - sigur te iubesc 90% - nu pot trai fara tine 100% - vrei sa fim iubiti? astept rasp nu cred tirmit numa de plictiseala...poate ma ubeste cineva si pe mine :)) ...dar pentru ca nu am dat mai departe nu am aflat si asa poate nu voi mai afla niciodata... ce trist :)
am nevoie urgent de o cartela reincarcabila si nu am de unde sa iau imi poti lua u si iti dau eu bani pe ea ?...si calu ce`o zis?!
votati va rog aici [link]... ui ce ma grabesc...numa sa ma machiez unpic :))
cum e corect sa spui? 3 pupils come in turn and write sau 3 pupils come in turns and writeam fata de wikipedia? sau de "free dictionary" ?!
Te plac, apoi te iubesc, acum mi-e frik sa nu te pierd, dak nu o trimiti la toti din lista ta, tu o sa pierzi pers. pe kre o iubesti! gata, tocmai ai fost blestemat/a! la miezul noptii adevarata ta iubire va realiza k te iubeste, ceva frumos se va intampla intre 1 si 4 dupa amiaza maine, se poate intampla oriunde FII PE FAZA la cel mai mare soc din viata ta, dak rupi lantul acesta vei fii blestemat timp de 10 ani dak iubesti pe cineva fa o copie si trimite la toti din lista ta in max. 10 min. si dragostea ta iti va trimite un msj. sau te va iubi. incerkti sa trimiteti mai departe, nu rupeti lantul (sOrry pt mass ) sCUZE DAR NU RISC CA E O TAMPENIE SI VA ROOOG NU-MI MAI TRIMITETI TAMPENII DIANSTEA CA VA SCOT DIN LISTA(l-am prmit si eu sorry)SUNT BLESTEMATA! ...traiesc degeaba! 10 ani...si daca mai pun la socoteala ca nu am primit doar odata acest mesaj... dar oricum nu se observa nici o diferenta dupa ce esti blestemat pe mess =)) ..da`mi plac adaugarile personale care le mai face cate un crispat ca poate se scoate ...si il credem ca el nu crede astfel de mesaje :)) ...ma si mir ca nu ma calcat trenu de 15 ori pe degetu mic de la picioru stang...
care joaca fifa 2008 sori de massdeci omu are fifa 2008...si trebuia sa stiu si eu ;) ca e la zi ...defapt acuma a aprut si 2009...omule esti in urma
...si sa nu mai zic de ortografie
...si asa mai departe :))
sa fiti iubiti! ;)
Cea mai stresanta intrebare din aceste zile: ce faci de rev? [rev = revelion ;)] ... raspunsul meu va fi acelasi pana in seara de 31 decembrie ... NU STIU ... nu ma mai stresati...vreau sa plec...dar nu am unde...vreau sa stau...dar nu am de ce... asa ca o sa ma duc la cabana Plapumioara... cu prietena mea Perna... si o sa avem un revelion ca`n filme ;) ...o sa fie interesant...
Sarbatori fericite!
In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went to church; the Jews called it 'Hanukkah' and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank. People passing each other on the street would say 'Merry Christmas!' or 'Happy Hanukkah!' or (to the atheists) 'Look out for the wall!'
~Dave Barry, "Christmas Shopping: A Survivor's Guide"
In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went to church; the Jews called it 'Hanukkah' and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank. People passing each other on the street would say 'Merry Christmas!' or 'Happy Hanukkah!' or (to the atheists) 'Look out for the wall!'
~Dave Barry, "Christmas Shopping: A Survivor's Guide"
...dar nu stiu ce sa tot scriu... m`a prins faza asta cu blogu, as tot scrie acuma, pana acuma dadeam paste ca era simplu... acuma de o vreme m`o apucat... si in fiecare zi as tot scrie... da nu am atatea idei, sau daca am le tin pentru mine, ca nu trebuie sa stie toata lumea tot, nu zic bine?! Nu am nici o idee, cateodata imi vin idei cand sunt pe afara, sau plecata... si pana sa ajung acasa, uit ce am vrut sa scriu, si ma enervez... fac riduri din cauza asta =)). Nici nu stiu de ce scriu, ca sa citeasca cineva sau asa ca sa fie acolo ceva scris si de mine... gata ca ma duc sa dorm... astept sa vina miercuri sa plec pe la colindat. :P Noapte buna!
PS... am uitat de lista pt Mos Craciun, dar acum ca l`am deconspirat... nu mai are sens =))
PS... am uitat de lista pt Mos Craciun, dar acum ca l`am deconspirat... nu mai are sens =))
Vazand postul Andreei in legatura cu Mos Craciun , nu m-am putut abtine si am cerut dreptul la replica. Fiindca suntem in perioada sarbatorilor de iarna, Andrea (cea care nu crede in mosu’ :p ) a hotarat sa imi acorde o sansa….. Drept urmare :)) ….. eu zic k Mos Craciun exista nu atat ca persoana fizica cat si ca spirit al Craciunului , acel spirit care aduce in casele oamenilor bucurie si lumina .. acesta fiind darul de la adevaratul Mos Craciun.. nu cum se gandeste Deea doar la cadouri materiale …..
Si totusi cred k fiecare dintre noi am “facut” pana acum pe Mos Craciun in diferite moduri : . ba daruind jucarii la copiii orfani…. ba dand 1 leu amarat unui “tiganus” …. Sau cel mai important ajutand o batranica sa treaca strada prin loc nepermis :)) ….. by Mircea B.
Am ajuns la concluzia ca exista cateva faze in viata la partea asta cu Mos Craciun....
1. e partea aia cand esti mic si prost si crezi ca exista Mos Craciun...chiar daca ii vezi prin magazine si la tine acasa si peste tot e altu, tu crezi ca undeva e unu, care`i ala adevarat si original...
2. faza unde am ajuns eu ;) .. .nu mai crezi ca exista Mos Craciun...esti si tu mare acuma ...nu mai poti fi dus cu zaharelu asa usor... iti amintesti si cum iti puneau ai tai cadouri sub brad si nu stii cum de erai asa fraier sa crezi... dar, viata e dura ;)
3. tu esti Mos Craciun; aici deja devine interesant... incepi sa fi tu Mos Craciun pentru copiii tai / nepoti / la gradinita din apropiere / prin mall (mai nou) ...sau mai stiu eu unde... dar poate ai sanse sa scapi de faza asta...
4. incepi sa semeni cu Mos Craciun, asta daca mai esti in viata, ca nu toti au sansa asta... si te duci pe strada in apropierea sarbatorilor si copiii zic... Mama, cred ca ala e Mosu... tare faza...bine nu o sa se zica de toti asa...dar or fi cativa...
1. e partea aia cand esti mic si prost si crezi ca exista Mos Craciun...chiar daca ii vezi prin magazine si la tine acasa si peste tot e altu, tu crezi ca undeva e unu, care`i ala adevarat si original...2. faza unde am ajuns eu ;) .. .nu mai crezi ca exista Mos Craciun...esti si tu mare acuma ...nu mai poti fi dus cu zaharelu asa usor... iti amintesti si cum iti puneau ai tai cadouri sub brad si nu stii cum de erai asa fraier sa crezi... dar, viata e dura ;)
3. tu esti Mos Craciun; aici deja devine interesant... incepi sa fi tu Mos Craciun pentru copiii tai / nepoti / la gradinita din apropiere / prin mall (mai nou) ...sau mai stiu eu unde... dar poate ai sanse sa scapi de faza asta...
4. incepi sa semeni cu Mos Craciun, asta daca mai esti in viata, ca nu toti au sansa asta... si te duci pe strada in apropierea sarbatorilor si copiii zic... Mama, cred ca ala e Mosu... tare faza...bine nu o sa se zica de toti asa...dar or fi cativa...
...de cand ma stiu...nu am mai facut chestile astea...pana anu asta.
1. am fost pentru prima data la karaoke :) ...dar nu m`am bagat sa cant :P
2. am condus cu 160 de km/ora... si am mers cu 190 de km/ora (in drepata ;))
3. am fost in Cluj, singura, ca sa ma intalnesc cu 2 fete cunoscute pe net :D
4. am dormit cu Diana intr`un pat de o persoana =))
5. am prins buchetu la o nunta :D
6. am traversat un lac la Ocna... fara sa stiu sa inot... nasoale clipe :))
7. am fost in 'drumetie' pe Magura... vai ce rau mi`a fost pe acolo [intrebati`o pe Cristina]
8. am facut un tort de la A-Z... cred ca asta a fost anu asta =)) [si a fost mancat :))]
9. am fost in Bucuresti pe Transfagarasan... nu retin sa mai fi fost :)
10. mi`am facut blog... ca sa pierd vremea
... si sigur au mai fi si altele dar fie nu`mi amintesc... fie nu vreau sa zic!
1. am fost pentru prima data la karaoke :) ...dar nu m`am bagat sa cant :P
2. am condus cu 160 de km/ora... si am mers cu 190 de km/ora (in drepata ;))
3. am fost in Cluj, singura, ca sa ma intalnesc cu 2 fete cunoscute pe net :D
4. am dormit cu Diana intr`un pat de o persoana =))
5. am prins buchetu la o nunta :D
6. am traversat un lac la Ocna... fara sa stiu sa inot... nasoale clipe :))
7. am fost in 'drumetie' pe Magura... vai ce rau mi`a fost pe acolo [intrebati`o pe Cristina]
8. am facut un tort de la A-Z... cred ca asta a fost anu asta =)) [si a fost mancat :))]
9. am fost in Bucuresti pe Transfagarasan... nu retin sa mai fi fost :)
10. mi`am facut blog... ca sa pierd vremea
... si sigur au mai fi si altele dar fie nu`mi amintesc... fie nu vreau sa zic!
Ma duc dupa ce ma trezesc prin bucatarie sa mananc... si vreau sa`mi fac o cacao cu lapte sa beau si eu dimineata in loc de "cafeaua de dimineata", cand dau sa aprind focul la aragaz... vad ca mai am un singur chibrit... si imi vine gandul ala de om pesimist 'sa vezi ca se stinge chibritu fix inainte sa aprinzi focu...si nu mai bei nici o cacao calda...' si va asteptati acuma ca acest chibrit sa se si stinga...nu? Da eu gandesc si optimist si vine o a doua voce 'ete na...fix acuma crezi ca se stinge...ca doar ai mai aprins focu si ai reusit cu primu chibrit de atatea ori... de ce ar fi acum altfel?' Mi`a mai ridicat moralu... ca nu aveam de gand sa caut alte chibrite... si dau sa aprind focu... si nu mi sa stins chibritu! Na!Am reusit! :))
...stiu ca te asteptai sa se stinga...
cica conversatie pe mess
una: asai k u ai pr br?
una: serria 1
DeeA: ce am? < ma decid sa intreb ce vrea? ... ca ma uitam crucis pana acuma... sa nu fie vre`un virus sau ceva ca poate am... si stie cum scapam de el :)) >
una: prison
<...acuma incep sa cred ca vorbeste de Prison Break... si ii spune fetei ca...>
DeeA: nu am
...si iar raman in aer fara pa / ceau / dute`ncolo ... sa fie sanatoasa ;)
una: asai k u ai pr br?
una: serria 1
DeeA: ce am? < ma decid sa intreb ce vrea? ... ca ma uitam crucis pana acuma... sa nu fie vre`un virus sau ceva ca poate am... si stie cum scapam de el :)) >
una: prison
<...acuma incep sa cred ca vorbeste de Prison Break... si ii spune fetei ca...>
DeeA: nu am
...si iar raman in aer fara pa / ceau / dute`ncolo ... sa fie sanatoasa ;)
Dear Lord, I pray for:
Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And patience for his moods;
Because Lord, if I pray for strength,
I'll beat him to death!
Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And patience for his moods;
Because Lord, if I pray for strength,
I'll beat him to death!
Remi Gaillard - este tipu care isi face de cap prin Franta ...
...ca si toti copiii m`am trezit si eu azi dimineatza si aveam pe birou o ciocolata... nu orice ciocolata... mai era si Milka... vorba aia ciocolata buna & scumpa :) . ...partea proasta vine acuma... "Mosule, tu nu stii ca nu`mi place ciocolata cu alune?" ...nu iti faci treaba pe care tre sa o faci...sa fim seriosi acuma...sa nu se mai intample!
si apropo, de Craciun... daca nu mai impodobesc brad primesc cadou? sau nu? ...cu criza asta nu mai am bani de brad... no... sa fi sanatos ;) ciau.
PS... o sa`mi pregatesc si lista pentru cadouri... ca sa nu mai am surprize si de Craciun ;)
A first grade teacher collected well-known proverbs. She gave each kid in the class the first half of the proverb, and asked them to fill in the rest. Here's what the kids came up with:
Better to be safe than... punch a 5th grader.
Strike while the... bug is close.
It's always darkest before... daylight savings time.
Never underestimate the power of... termites.
You can lead a horse to water but... how?
Don't bite the hand that... looks dirty.
No news is... impossible.
A miss is as good as a... Mr.
You can't teach an old dog... math.
If you lie down with dogs, you... will stink in the morning.
Love all, trust... me.
The pen is mightier than... the pigs.
An idle mind is... the best way to relax.
Where there is smoke, there's... pollution.
Happy is the bride who... gets all the presents.
A penny saved is... not much.
Two is company, three's... The Musketeers.
None are so blind as... Helen Keller.
Children should be seen and not... spanked or grounded.
If at first you don't succeed... get new batteries.
You get out of something what you... see pictured on the box.
When the blind lead the blind... get out of the way.
There is no fool like... Aunt Edie.
Laugh and the whole world laughs with you. Cry and... you have to blow your nose.
Better to be safe than... punch a 5th grader.
Strike while the... bug is close.
It's always darkest before... daylight savings time.
Never underestimate the power of... termites.
You can lead a horse to water but... how?
Don't bite the hand that... looks dirty.
No news is... impossible.
A miss is as good as a... Mr.
You can't teach an old dog... math.
If you lie down with dogs, you... will stink in the morning.
Love all, trust... me.
The pen is mightier than... the pigs.
An idle mind is... the best way to relax.
Where there is smoke, there's... pollution.
Happy is the bride who... gets all the presents.
A penny saved is... not much.
Two is company, three's... The Musketeers.
None are so blind as... Helen Keller.
Children should be seen and not... spanked or grounded.
If at first you don't succeed... get new batteries.
You get out of something what you... see pictured on the box.
When the blind lead the blind... get out of the way.
There is no fool like... Aunt Edie.
Laugh and the whole world laughs with you. Cry and... you have to blow your nose.
Wearing white is always in style - even after Labor Day.
Getting outside in the winter is good for your health.
Getting outside in the winter is good for your health.
It's fun just to hang out in your front yard.
We're all made up of mostly water.
Accessories don't have to be expensive.
Don't get too much sun!
If you're a little bottom heavy - hey, that's okay!
You know you've made it when they write a song about you.
If you look down and can't see your feet - you're probably not very active.
Sometimes sweating too much can have disasterous results.
Accessories don't have to be expensive.
Don't get too much sun!
If you're a little bottom heavy - hey, that's okay!
You know you've made it when they write a song about you.
If you look down and can't see your feet - you're probably not very active.
Sometimes sweating too much can have disasterous results.
Intr-o zi, un sofer de autobuz a mers ca de obicei la serviciu, si-a pornit bus-ul si a plecat pe traseu. Nimic deosebit la primele cateva statii: cativa oameni care-au urcat, cativa care-au coborat si totul a fost ok. La urmatoarea statie, insa, un tip enorm a urcat in bus, cam 1,90 m, cu constitutie de luptator categoria grea... s-a uitat spre sofer zicand: "Big John nu plateste!" si s-a asezat pe un scaun. V-am spus ca soferul avea cam 1,60m, era slabanog si genul de om bland?... Asa ca nu s-a certat cu Big John, dar nu i-a convenit chestia asta deloc. Urmatoarea zi se intampla acelasi lucru - Big John a urcat iar in bus, a spus tare ca el nu plateste si s-a asezat.
Urmatoarea zi iarasi... si-n zilele urmatoare la fel... Pana cand soferul n-a mai rezistat, deja avea insomnii din cauza lui Big John care-si batea joc de el. As ca-ntr-un final, s-a inscris la niste cursuri de body-building, karate, judo si alte arte martiale. Dupa cateva luni, deja era foarte puternic, mai mult, devenise foarte increzator. Asa ca, ziua urmatoare cand Big John urca in bus si spuse "Big John nu plateste", soferul s-a ridicat, i-a aruncat o privire crunta si-a zbierat la el: "Si de ce nu?" Big John l-a privit foarte uimit si i-a replicat: "Big John are abonament".
Morala: ASIGURA-TE CA EXISTA O PROBLEMA INAINTE DE-A FACE EFORTURI URIASE S-O REZOLVI!
Urmatoarea zi iarasi... si-n zilele urmatoare la fel... Pana cand soferul n-a mai rezistat, deja avea insomnii din cauza lui Big John care-si batea joc de el. As ca-ntr-un final, s-a inscris la niste cursuri de body-building, karate, judo si alte arte martiale. Dupa cateva luni, deja era foarte puternic, mai mult, devenise foarte increzator. Asa ca, ziua urmatoare cand Big John urca in bus si spuse "Big John nu plateste", soferul s-a ridicat, i-a aruncat o privire crunta si-a zbierat la el: "Si de ce nu?" Big John l-a privit foarte uimit si i-a replicat: "Big John are abonament".
Morala: ASIGURA-TE CA EXISTA O PROBLEMA INAINTE DE-A FACE EFORTURI URIASE S-O REZOLVI!
A married couple in their early 60s was out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.
Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said, "For being such an exemplary married couple and for being faithful to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish." "Ooh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband" said the wife. The fairy moved her magic stick and - abracadabra! - two tickets for the new QM2 luxury liner appeared in her hands.
Now it was the husbands turn. He thought for a moment and said: "Well this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this only occurs once in a lifetime, so, I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me".
The wife, and the fairy, was deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish... So the fairy made a circle with her magic stick and - abracadabra! - the husband became 92 years old.
The moral of this story:
Men might be ungrateful idiots... But... Fairies are... Females!!!
Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said, "For being such an exemplary married couple and for being faithful to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish." "Ooh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband" said the wife. The fairy moved her magic stick and - abracadabra! - two tickets for the new QM2 luxury liner appeared in her hands.
Now it was the husbands turn. He thought for a moment and said: "Well this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this only occurs once in a lifetime, so, I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me".
The wife, and the fairy, was deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish... So the fairy made a circle with her magic stick and - abracadabra! - the husband became 92 years old.
The moral of this story:
Men might be ungrateful idiots... But... Fairies are... Females!!!
To realize
The value of a sister
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.
To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.
To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.
To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.
To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born.
To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother who has given birth to
A premature baby.
To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realize
The value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.
To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.
The value of a sister
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.
To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.
To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.
To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.
To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born.
To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother who has given birth to
A premature baby.
To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realize
The value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.
To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.
To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident.
To realize
The value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics
To realize the value of a friend:
Lose one.
Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
You can share it with someone special.
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident.
To realize
The value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics
To realize the value of a friend:
Lose one.
Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
You can share it with someone special.
Number 5: They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen.Number 4: This is just a 15 minute power up nap they have raved about in the time-management course you sent me to.
Number 3: 'Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-out. You probably got here just in time.!'
Number 2: Did you ever notice sound coming out of these keyboards when you put your ear down real close?
Number 1: best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk:
(Raising you head up slowly) ...in Jesus name, Amen.
* The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.
* Veni, Vedi, Visa: I came, I saw, I did a little shopping.
* Do unto others before they do unto you.
* Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
* Don't play stupid with me. I'm better at it.
* Experience is learning a lot of crap you didn't really want to know.
* I used to care, but I take a pill for that now.
* If 10 percent is good enough for God, it should be enough for the IRS.
* Was today really necessary?
* If 10 percent is good enough for God, it should be enough for the IRS.
* Was today really necessary?
* Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
* The more I learn, the less I understand.
* Just because people don't understand you doesn't make you an artist.
* There are two important things to remember about surrealism. Frogs, power tools, and the Lincoln Memorial.
* There are two important things to remember about surrealism. Frogs, power tools, and the Lincoln Memorial.
* I came here with nothing, and I still have most of it.
* Even if you win the rat race, you're still a rat.
* Pass carefully. Driver chews tobacco.
* O.K., I take it back. Unscrew you.
* Even if you win the rat race, you're still a rat.
* Pass carefully. Driver chews tobacco.
* O.K., I take it back. Unscrew you.
* The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.
* I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.
* Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
* Better living through denial.
* Better living through denial.
* You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
* Beauty is only a light switch away.
* Beer: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
* I got a gun for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
* Beer: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
* I got a gun for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
* So you're a feminist. Isn't that cute!* I need someone really bad. Are you really bad?
* I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing.
* Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
* It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
* If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.
* A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
You would have to eat more than a dozen Hershey Bars to get the amount of caffeine in one cup of coffee. A favorite dish of the Aztecs was roast turkey with chocolate gravy. The best selling candy bar in the U.S. is Snickers. Chocolate manufacturers currently use 40 percent of the world's almonds and 20 percent of the world's peanuts. Chocolate syrup was used for blood in the famous shower scene in Alfred Hitchcock's movie, Psycho. White chocolate contains no caffeine. Half of Americans choose what chocolate they eat by the shape of the piece. American chocolate manufacturers use about 1.5 billion pounds of milk—only surpassed by the cheese and ice cream industries. On his fourth voyage to the New World, in 1502, Christopher Columbus was the first European to taste chocolate. In soda fountain slang, a "bucket of mud" is a bowl of chocolate ice cream. In a recent survey, 70 percent of female respondents said they would rather have chocolate than sex. Chocolate first appeared on film when Jean Harlow ate candy in the 1933 comedy Dinner at Eight. Sixty-three percent of Americans say they can't resist buying a chocolate for themselves when buying chocolates for someone else. The average American eats about 10 pounds of chocolate a year. The Swiss average 20 pounds a year. It takes 400 cacao beans to make one pound of chocolate. Nabisco uses more than 37 million pounds of chocolate a year to make Chips Ahoy cookies. The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket. Chocolate was once considered a temptation of the devil. Vanilla is used to make chocolate. Of all cookies baked in the United States, 25 percent are chocolate chip. A national survey showed 80 percent of U.S. teachers in grades kindergarten through eighth grade have received chocolate as a gift from their students. There are 96 Hershey's Kisses in one pound. The factory in Hackettstown, New Jersey which makes M&Ms produces 300 million M&Ms a day or about 100 billion M&Ms a year. Consumers spend more than $7 billion a year on chocolate. U.S. consumers eat 2.8 billion pounds of chocolate annually, representing nearly half of the world's supply. Chocolate can be lethal to dogs. Each Hershey's Kiss is wrapped in five square inches of foil wrap. Napoleon carried chocolate with him on his military campaigns, and always ate it when he needed quick energy. Chocolate in a blue wrapper won't sell in Shanghai or Hong Kong because the Chinese associate blue with death.* I feel so much better since I lost hope.
* It's people like you that make people like me take medicine.
* Alzheimer's. A disease that...where are my socks?* Don't vote. It just encourages them.
* Reality is a nice place, but I wouldn't want to live there.
* If walking is so good for you, why does my mailman look like that?
* Ask me about my vow of silence.
* If the answer isn't beer, you've asked the wrong question.
* Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
* Before you condemn someone, walk a mile in their shoes. Then you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
* We must silence those who oppose freedom of speech.
* A man does not have to be a bigamist to have one wife too many.
* Try not to let your mind wander. It's too small and fragile to be out by itself.
* Guys, just because you have one, doesn't mean you have to be one.
* I'm happily married, but my wife isn't.
* Real women don't have hot flashes, they have power surges.
* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* You are right where you belong. Behind me.
* Old age comes at a bad time.
ce ma dispera cand se baga cineva in seama ca sa iti ceara sau sa te intrebe ceva si dupa ce raspunzi sau dai
ce`i trebuie zice "BRB" ...adica mai pe romaneste...pa ca nu mai avem ce discuta...ca io vad ca idle nu vine....busy nici gand....si sign out nici atata....zi domne mersi frumos, ceau, vorbim cand o sa mai am nevoie de ceva de la tine...sau mai bine intreaba pe cineva cu care vorbesti toata ziua de la bun inceput, sau lasa brbu ca oricum se stie ca e cam acelasi lucru cu bine ma fraiere, te`am facut.
atat am avut de zis...BRB =))
ce`i trebuie zice "BRB" ...adica mai pe romaneste...pa ca nu mai avem ce discuta...ca io vad ca idle nu vine....busy nici gand....si sign out nici atata....zi domne mersi frumos, ceau, vorbim cand o sa mai am nevoie de ceva de la tine...sau mai bine intreaba pe cineva cu care vorbesti toata ziua de la bun inceput, sau lasa brbu ca oricum se stie ca e cam acelasi lucru cu bine ma fraiere, te`am facut.atat am avut de zis...BRB =))
In this life I'm a woman. In my next life, I'd like to come back as a bear. When you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that too.
When you're a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs. I could definitely deal with that.
If you're mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too. I could deal with that.
If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.
Yup, 'gonna be a bear!
Shakespeare
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she ever comes back, she's yours,
If she doesn't, here's the poison, suicide yourself for her.
Optimist
If you love someone, set her free ...
Don't worry, she will come back.
Suspicious
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she ever comes back, ask her why.
Impatient
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she doesn't comes back within some time forget her.
Patient
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she doesn't come back, continue to wait until she comes back.
Playful
If you love someone, set her free ...
*If she comes back, and if you love her still, set her free again, repeat*
C++ Programmer
if(you-love(m_she))
m_she.free()
if(m_she == NULL)
m_she= new CShe;
Lawyers
If you love someone, set her free ...
Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the second amendment of the Matrimonial Freedom Act clearly states that ...
Bill Gates
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she comes back, I think we can charge her for re-installation fees but tell her that she's also going to get an upgrade.
Biologist
If you love someone, set her free ...
She'll evolve.
Statisticians
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she loves you, the probability of her coming back is high If she doesn't, the Weibull distribution and your relation was improbable anyway.
Salesman
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she ever comes back, deal!
If she doesn't, so what! "NEXT".
Schwarzenegger's fans
If you love someone, set her free ...
SHE'LL BE BACK!
Insurance agent
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she ever comes back, sign her up,
If she doesn't, keep follow up with her and never give up!
Physician
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she ever comes back, it's the law of gravity,
If she doesn't, either there's friction higher than the force or the angle of collision between two objects did not synchronize at the right angle.
Mathematician
If you love someone, set her free ...
If she ever comes back, 1 + 1 = 2 (peanut!),
If she doesn't, Y = 2X - log(0.46Y^2 + (cos(52/34X)) x 5Y^(-0.5)c) where c is the infinite constant of no turning point.
Nowadays' style
If you love someone, set her free ...
If It Comes Back, It is Yours.
If It Doesn't, Hunt it Down and Kill It!
Or perhaps report to immigration that she / is is an illegal.
La Radio Erevan, intrebare plina de patos?
- Alo, buna ziua. As dori sa stiu si eu de ce in Elvetia nu se asculta manele!
- Pentru ca e tara neutra.
- Asa, si?
- Cum asa, si? Daca e tara neutra, nu are dusmani!
